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Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Signs that Maybe You're Having a Problem with Trump

Les jeux sont fait, mes amis. It’s over, folks. Trump will be taking his first dump at the White House on January 20, 2017 whether you and I like it or not. So please stop with the “Not My President” bullshit and find some other form of opposition. Whether you have resigned yourself to this fact or not you may be suffering some side-effects. Here are just a few of the symptoms people are reporting as Inauguration Day draws near.

1.    You purchased a new office chair that allows you to work in the fetal position.

2.    News reports of miserable refugees fleeing hell holes in the Middle East and Africa make you sigh with envy.

3.    You have almost convinced yourself that perhaps George W. Bush wasn’t so bad after all.

4.    You have almost convinced yourself that perhaps Benito Mussolini wasn’t so bad after all.

5.    You find yourself buying more and more nonperishable food items and storing them in the basement—and you didn’t have a basement before the election so you dug one.

6.    As you drink more and more you have run out of projects for the wine corks you have saved since the election so you built the USA/Mexico wall with them.

7.    You are still clinging to the hope that this is all some reality TV hoax and that Obama will come on the air and tell us that he was just fucking with us.

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