The Great Battle Not to Be Flushed in La Liga 2022-2023”

https://www.arabnews.com/node/2314281/football

 After a mostly joyless season as a Valencia Club de Fútbol fan, the most exciting game of the season may be Sunday’s final match in what I’m calling “The Great Battle Not to Be Flushed in La Liga 2022-2023.”

 I can't ever remember being so invested in not seeing a train wreck happen before my very eyes, and I was a Chicago Cubs fan as a child, a shit team back then but they never got tossed out of MLB. To steal a good joke, it will be like being tied to a chair and watching a toddler play with a loaded pistol.

 ¡Amunt València, Visca el València del nostre cor!

 The very last game this season of the Spanish La Liga has six clubs fighting separately not to be relegated with all final games to be played at the same hour on Sunday:

 

Celta de Vigo

Barcelona

 

Betis

Valencia C.F.

 

Elche C.F.     

Cádiz

 

Valladolid

Getafe

 

RCD Espanyol

Almería

Euro2016

I made these picks before the first minute of play in this year’s Euro2016. So far things haven’t totally gone to shit and the only thing that really matters is that Spain won our first match although I wasn’t able to watch the game. I have watched quite a few of the matches thus fat which means that I’ve drunk a lot of beer which hinders my heavy training regimen. As motivated as I am in my training I am also committed to watching as much football as possible which is always a good time to catch up with my friends. 

Copa de América Update: Sometimes my insomnia pays off like last night when I woke up at 3:30 and remembered to tune in the USA-Ecuador game which we won 2-1. It looks like we will get to witness the world’s best footballer in the next round. USA-Argentina!

Leo Messi

The difference between Leo Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo is in this goal. Both are superb players and Ronaldo is the best finisher in the game. The difference is that only Messi is capable of making a bar full of football fans laugh out loud with his often absurdly inventive play. This is yet another of those many "Get the fuck out of here" moments.

Ways to Make Football a Better Game

1) Put a Stop to Diving. This is, without a doubt, what I hate the most about the game. I hate how faking an injury has been turned into a crucial element of the sport, at least for some players and teams. Let players know that this will no longer be tolerated and players acting out injuries will be punished. Period. How can this be achieved? There are a lot of things that could be done but #4 on this list would help solve the problem.

2) Make Offside Calls Electronic. I don’t think that I’ve ever seen a game in which there wasn’t at least one bad offside call, the bad call may not have affected the game in any way but it’s still a bad call. We already have the technology in place because on TV we see it immediately. The human eye is not capable of seeing two different points on the field at the same time. With an electronic call flags would go up and a whistle would blow to end the play. No flags and no whistles mean no call and play proceeds.

3) Make Defense More Difficult. If there is one damn thing the sport needs it’s more goals. If there were more goals there would be less of a chance that a single bad call by the referee would ruin a game. The easiest way to hinder the defender is to make it an immediate expulsion to hold on to another player, either by grabbing their uniform or a part of their body. It’s not like players actually pull on someone’s jersey by accident so there shouldn’t be any crying when there is an expulsion for this. Corner kicks would be a lot easier to score if this were enforced.

4) Two 45 Minute Halves. No injury time and when the clock runs out the game is over unless the ball is in the air flying towards the goal. If a player is injured the play continues. If a player needs to be taken off the field then the ref can stop the clock and restart it when play resumes so that everyone knows exactly how much time is left in the game. I have seen games with 10 minutes tacked on to the end and countless games when play just seems to go on forever even after it should have stopped simply because one team is threatening to score. This rule would cut down a lot on diving because there wouldn’t be time for the phony drama as play wouldn’t stop due to someone flopping.  If play is halted because of an injury then the injured player must sit on the sidelines for five minutes or be substituted. The clock means so little in football that I don’t know why they bother with it at all.