Quantcast

Important Notice

Special captions are available for the humor-impaired.

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

All In A Day's Work



Trilobite: Our revolting ancestor
While others celebrate Christmas, or Chanukah, or Ramadan, or whatever stupid shit people believe in I celebrate man’s inexorable quest to understand how life began on our planet. I have read something similar in other books but this is from Bill Bryson’s A Short History of Nearly Everything:

“If you imagine the 4,500-billion-odd years of Earth's (How this is written makes zero sense to me. The age of the earth is 4.5 billion years) history compressed into a normal earthly day, then life begins very early, about 4 A.M., with the rise of the first simple, single-celled organisms, but then advances no further for the next sixteen hours. Not until almost 8:30 in the evening, with the day five-sixths over, has Earth anything to show the universe but a restless skin of microbes. Then, finally, the first sea plants appear, followed twenty minutes later by the first jellyfish and the enigmatic Ediacaran fauna first seen by Reginald Sprigg in Australia. At 9:04 P.M. trilobites swim onto the scene, followed more or less immediately by the shapely creatures of the Burgess Shale. Just before 10 P.M. plants begin to pop up on the land. Soon after, with less than two hours left in the day, the first land creatures follow. Thanks to ten minutes or so of balmy weather, by 10:24 the Earth is covered in the great carboniferous forests whose residues give us all our coal, and the first winged insects are evident. Dinosaurs plod onto the scene just before 11 P.M. and hold sway for about three-quarters of an hour. At twenty-one minutes to midnight they vanish and the age of mammals begins. Humans emerge one minute and seventeen seconds before midnight. The whole of our recorded history, on this scale, would be no more than a few seconds, a single human lifetime barely an instant.”

This reminds me of the old Woody Allen line, "Today I saw a red-and-yellow sunset and thought, How insignificant I am! Of course, I thought the same thing yesterday and it rained."

No comments:

Post a Comment

If you can't say something nice, say it here.