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Wednesday, June 18, 2003

My Stockpot Can Kick Your Stockpot's Ass!

I like to cook. I think that in another life I must have been an Italian grandmother who cooked for about 20 people every day. I make my own chicken stock and freeze the contents in containers ranging in size from a few quarts to ice cube trays. Ice-cube-tray- sized portions of chicken stock are great when you sauté vegetables or want to jazz something up.

I have a freaking enormous stockpot. It reminds me of the big pots the cannibals used in the bugs bunny cartoons. I could fit your scrawny-assed pot with you in it inside my pot. Why do I need such a big fucking stockpot? Hell if I know. Maybe my thingy is too small and I am compensating. Perhaps it is because at 5’9” I am considered a legal midget in our society. I sure as hell don’t need to make five gallons of stock at a time. I still have several quarts in the freezer from the last batch and I am making a new batch as I write this.

If I may say so I think I make the best risotto I have ever tasted. If you make your own risotto you realize why restaurants can’t compete with making it yourself. Risotto is incredibly time-consuming. It takes about 20 minutes of constant stirring to make it. Restaurants must prep their risotto ahead of time which means that the Arborio rice is never al dente like I prefer but mushy and over-cooked. I also use my own chicken stock which is of a higher quality than most restaurants are willing to make.

I was supposed to be cleaning my apartment but instead I have trashed my kitchen and spent the past hour and a half farting around online. I think I need help.

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