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Monday, February 04, 2013

What's Crawling Out of the Woodwork? Gun Nuts!


Is it just me or has America’s gun control debate really brought out the lunatics? It reminds me of those hilarious columns in The Onion like “Ask a High-School Student Who Didn’t Do the Required Reading” ("Ask An Auctioneer Revealing He Was Molested As A Child" is also hilarious) where no matter what the question the answer is a high school kid faking it through an assignment by reading the book jacket.  If you think we need some sort of law requiring gun owners to pass a mental health exam then few of the crazies posting comments on just about every web forum would be qualified. Maybe to purchase a firearm you also need to prove that you know the difference between "then" and "than."  Here is an example of the idea I stole from The Onion (America's Finest News Source):

Ask a Mentally Unstable Gun Nut and Self-Proclaimed Second Amendment Expert*

Question: I’ve been thinking of going to Spain for vacation this summer but is the exchange rate still unfavorable to Americans?

Answer: If Barry the Fascist has his way, he's going to ban all new gun sales, and while the fight in the courts to overturn his unconstitutional ban drags on for years, you will be unable to purchase any guns in the interim.  Don't think it can't happen here. Barry is serious about destroying the United States, and he knows he has only a few years left to get it done. (This is an actual comment from some mouth-breather in the comments section of The Washington Post and nearly as off topic as the high school kid)

The difference is that The Onion is funny and the gun nuts are just creepy.  I am not exaggerating in the least when I say that these people are certifiably crazy. I think one way to define madness is when what you say, over and fucking over, has not the smallest basis in fact.  Where has anyone, anywhere in America talked about banning all new gun sales?

* And yes, I know that I am probably being redundant by writing "mentally unstable gun nut."


  1. Where in the fuck did you get that awesome photo?

  2. My camera has an auto mode. I can push a button, set the camera down, and then take a picture of myself. Pretty cool, huh?

  3. Caption:

    "This is my weapon, this is my gun, this one's for fighting, this one's for fun."


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