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Wednesday, April 22, 2009

1,000 Things About Me

You could read every word that I have written on this web page and not really learn much about me. I find the sort of personal, gossipy blog stuff to be a tremendous bore, especially about my life. With that said, just this once I thought that I would share some facts about my personal life.

-I've never had a tattoo.

-I have never had a piercing.

-I have never "peeled out" in a car and never wanted to.

-Most of the time I have a haircut that is well within military standards. Long hair just bugs the shit out of me. I don't know how hippies do it.

-I'm not tryng to brag but I have never seen a single episode of American Idol or Survivor or any other piece of shit "realty" show.

-For almost my entire adult life I have always been the oldest among all of my friends. This has sucked enormously at times as I am always on the end of the “grandpa” jokes. On the plus side, I think that being around younger people has kept me younger, both in body and in spirit. Most of my friends know that if it came down to it I could kick their asses, not that I ever would. I hope that they know that I'm a great guy to have your back in a sticky situation.

-The longest that I have lived anywhere since I was 15 years old was the 8 years I lived in Seattle. Since I was 15 I have lived in 10 places for at least 1 year. Yikes, I'm a freaking gypsy.

-I have been an avid cyclist since I was about 14 and I bought my first Raleigh racing bike. Since then I haven't missed too many bike rides. I have had the great pleasure of living in some great places for cycling. Lately I have been riding daily, almost to the point of exhaustion as I have taken to listening to audio books on my rides and I never want to stop pedaling.

-I am 5'9” and about 180 pounds. The cool thing about living in Spain is that I don't feel short over here. I think that 5'9” isn't so short that you suffer from a Napoleon complex, it just means that you aren't a great asset on the basketball team. Fuck it, I don't like basketball anyway.

-I was lucky to inherit my mother's Mediterranean stomach. My stomach could be used for a toxic waste dump. There isn't any sort of food that is too hot for me to eat. I remember going with my nephew to eat at Seattle's Wingdome chicken wing joint restaurant. When asked I naturally ordered the spiciest wings. Fuck were they hot! I ate them all but I had to pace myself. I asked the waiter if anyone else had ever ordered them and he told me that, as far as he knew, only two African guys. I told him that in the future he’d better let people know that those little suckers are very hot. A normal person would have died eating them.

-I'm an atheist and always have been. Since I have been old enough to consider the subject I've always felt like the idea of god doesn't make sense.

-Never married, no kids, lots of nieces and nephews. My biggest regret in this life is not spending more time with my family. They are always welcome to visit and I have always lived in really cool places.

-I love dogs but don't have one. I lack the security, as sad and pathetic as that sounds. I have a marine turtle called a red eared slider. I call him El Conde de Monte Cristo, or El Conde for short. I named him this because in his former, much smaller tank he spent the entire day trying to escape. He seems more content in his big aquarium.

-We are all great swimmers in my family. I was going to do it competitively in high school until I quickly realized what a completely stupid sport it is. Even as a 14 year old, I had better things to do with my time than stare at the bottom of a swimming pool for hours a day. I am a certified diver but I much prefer snorkeling. I have free dived down to almost 100 feet before. Snorkeling is probably the coolest thing I have ever done in my life, especially when it's somewhere great like Greece, the Caribbean, or a beautiful quarry in Indiana.

-I can't stand playing games of any kind whether it's cards, board games, chess, or whatever. I don't bowl so don't ask.

-I took up playing piano when I was about 38 or so. I don’t play much lately and I suck but I still enjoy playing from time to time.

-I studied Niseido Ju Jitsu when I lived in Florida. I was a fairly devoted student for about three years. You had to be a fairly devoted student or Prof Ricardi would stomp a mud puddle in your chest. He was the best teacher I've ever had and put all of my university professors to shame.

-I don't have anything of a sweet tooth. I have plenty of other vices. What do ya got?