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Friday, March 16, 2018

Mistakes Will Be Made

“I hate spelling errors; you mix up two letters and the whole thing is urined.” – Annonymous

My childhood dream of becoming a superhero has finally arrived. As no one could ever accused me of thinking big, the superpower I imagined for myself was to be a tolerably good speller.* I just rely on spell-check, but it still feels pretty amazing. A few of the villains I have vanquished in this story: diarrhea, rhythm, rhyme, Fahrenheit, cemetery, and maneuver. If I’m forced to write with a pen and paper you’ll probably see these words crossed out after a few failed attempts and alternate words put in their place, e.g. “diarrhea” is replaced by the far less elegant “the squirts” and so on. 

*I’m talking about English. I have a very adversarial relationship with Spanish, French, Arabic, and even Greek, but they are quite easy when it comes to spelling because of a little thing called rules.

P.S. Poop and pee both touched on in this post. If I did a fart joke I would have hit the low-brow humor trifecta. I think that I just did!

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