Missed It By That Much*

Sometimes the difference between success and failure can be cruelly and insignificantly small. I invested every penny I had in gag t-shirts that said, “Sex Instructor, Second Lesson Free!” Some other yahoo came along and monopolized the market by changing my slogan to “Sex Instructor, First Lesson Free.” I don’t really get what the big difference is, but the guy cleaned up, and I went bankrupt.

So now that guy who did nothing but change "second" to "first" is living like a Mexican cartel boss, and I get what? Nothing? Why is it so much better to get the first lesson for free? More importantly, do people really buy these shirts and wear them? What is wrong with our planet?

P.S. I had to create the new label of Humor? just for this post, although it probably fits for much of what I write.

*The title was a catch-phrase of a shitty TV program I grew up watching only because I had nothing else to do and zero imagination.

Neighborly

A café in my neighborhood recently changed staff and the new Chinese couple appear to be right off the boat, as we say in America. They speak almost no Spanish. Every time I go there, I witness innumerable acts of patience, kindness, sweetness, and charm from the Spanish patrons as they walk the couple through the intricacies of how to work a corner café. I’ve never witnessed any unkindness and no taunts along the lines of “Why don’t you speak Spanish?” or “Why don’t you go back.” This isn’t to say that there is no racism here, but it isn’t toxic, it isn’t literally killing people.