Randomness

You fucking half-wit!  or You killed our sister!

Even the most tired subjects in humor take on new life when you add profanity or horrific violence. Those old Family Circus cartoons were tedious, even back when I first learned to read. Add something terrible, and the humor spikes.

 Have you ever noticed that the expression “Who died and made you the Pope?” doesn’t make any sense at all? I’ve been thinking about that all day. I mean, obviously, the person who died must have been the Pope because if not, we wouldn’t need a new one. And the College of Cardinals elects the new Pope—at least that’s the way it was before I got kicked out of Catholicism. So, both questions are answered: The Pope and the College of Cardinals.

There are a lot of things to complain about when it comes to cell phones, but the worst thing is that there aren't any pay phones around these days which means you can't pick up a ringing phone—say at the train station—and have a conversation with a total stranger.