I
just watched the intro to a new series on HBO. At the end of the credits I had
to rewind to be sure of what I had just seen. They list a co-producer, then
another, then “produced by” some other asshole, then a consulting producer,
then a co-executive producer, then three executive producers were listed
together, and finally seven other executive producers each had their own screen
for their personal glory. That’s 15 of these jerk-offs if you’re counting. My
question is this: why do I as a viewer give a shit
who the producers are? Answer: I don’t. So why would any sane person want to
watch the intro to a series? At least with Gilligan’s Island they gave you a
catchy tune.
In
Spanish there is a lovely expression for when someone toots their own horn.
They say that the person “no tiene abuela,” he doesn’t have a grandmother,
because grannies are supposed to toot your horn for you. Obviously, Hollywood
producers don’t have grandmothers.
If you want to be famous, be an actor.
Acabo de ver
la introducción a una nueva serie en HBO. Al final de los créditos tuve que
rebobinar para estar seguro de lo que acababa de ver. Enumeran un coproductor,
luego otro, luego "producido por" otro gilipollas, luego un productor
consultor, luego un productor co-ejecutivo, luego tres productores ejecutivos
se enumeran juntos, y finalmente otros siete productores ejecutivos tienen cada
uno su propia pantalla para su gloria personal Eso es 15 de estos idiotas si
estás contando. Mi pregunta es esta: ¿por qué a un espectador le importa un
comino quiénes son los productores? Respuesta: Nos importa una mierda.
Entonces, ¿por qué una persona con cerebro querría ver la introducción a una
serie? Al menos con Gilligan's Island te dieron una melodía pegadiza.
En español
hay una expresión encantadora para cuando alguien se jacta de si mismo. Dicen
que la persona "no tiene abuela" no tiene una abuela, porque se
supone que las abuelas se jactan de ellos. Obviamente, los productores de
Hollywood no tienen abuelas.
The explosions of "producers" in the credits is associated with the entertainment business and the way residuals are paid, especially since the advent of streaming services. In order to receive payments, the even more meager ones as compared to the past, writers and actors are now named as producers.
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