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Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Dogs and Cats Living in Sin

Dogs and Cats Living in Sin

I pass by some sort of abandoned house on one of my bike rides down along the beach. I usually just speed by it but today I rolled into the driveway to check it out. I was immediately surrounded by four or five small dogs all yapping away like their territory depended on it. There were also lots of straggly stray cats living there. You know what dogs say about screwing a cat, “It’s fun until your friends catch you doing it.” They didn’t stop barking until I started peeing over everything and then they just sort of slinked away in shame.

Now maybe this inter-species orgy doesn’t go against the teachings of whatever church you signed on with, but steamy dog-on-cat action certainly violates everything that I hold sacred in evolutionary biology. Cat-on-dog action is just unspeakably unwholesome—even on the internet. There’s a new sheriff in town, fellas. No more unnatural acts. I’ll be checking in from time to time.

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